My prayers are with you...

Hello Everyone! Carol invited me to contribute to "Our Ayllu Sacred Drum Project blog" and I am honored to do so. By way of introduction, I am a Musician, drummaker (maker of carol's qilaut Laughing Wolf) and dreamer whose hands have repeatedly demonstrated more intelligence than my head (or the other centers of wanting for that matter). Nevertheless I'm going to plunge in here and hope that my words are in some small way informed by the spirit of the drum.

This business of making a drum as ceremony brings tears to my eyes every time. Each of us who does this work stands before the great spirit in our own private way, in our own time and asks, "Will you help me? Will you join me in bringing this drum into being? And the Great Spirit invariably answers,"Who is it who is asking? Who is it who wants to know?

And with that, all sense of certainty, all sense of identity in me dissolves. And when the Great Spirit says, who is it who is listening???? I thought I knew a little while ago, but I'm not so sure now....... This is how it begins for me. "And for what purpose?" is the next question that throws me into a tailspin. "Well, Great Spirit, you know, service and healing. .....?....."

It is an ageless and endless conversation I'm afraid. And ones knowledge of the process is small coin indeed. But however imperfect and unprepared we are for this co-drummaking with spirit, we forge ahead because we must.

And rest assured, the power of the drum will be bought as much by your anxiety, self questioning, fear and uncertainty as by your courage and open heartedness. It will be a marvelous and powerful drum! I salute you all and send you my prayers and good wishes.

Mitakuye Oyasin, John Millen